sweetfairydream (sweetfairydream) wrote in 1stgaytry,

Im NeW

Hi every one, i never really had an idea that i would be attracted to girls until just recently about 3-4 months ago. I have been around gay people since like eight grade and im 19 soon to be 20. My sister is a lesbian. Well about 5 months ago i started workin at a new job and i had met a few people and well one of the girls was interested in me. Before i found this out i started realizing that i was developing feelings for her. I didnt understand it and couldnt explain it. I had a boyfriend at the time and well i just felt so messed up but it felt incredible. She knew without me even telling her. For the first few nights we were texting back and forth and she finally came out and said it was different when i flirted back because of the look i had in my eyes. So eventually i confessed that ya i did and that i didnt exactly know what was goin on and i was confused by the whole thing. Well i tried getting ahold of my sister and talkin to her about it but she was never home and well i decided to message her on myspace and wow did she freak. She just couldnt process what i had told her. It took her a few days and her roommate sitting down and talkin to her. Im not sure if i am a full lesbian. The problem i am having is telling friends and wondering what they are goin to think i mean none of these people i really talk to that much n e more but still. The only real people that know are my mom, my sister, and the people i worked with. I mean i felt alot of presser from her to come out and be open with it. She isnt afraid to show affection infront of people. I am still gettin use to that. if anyone has n e advice for me or want to share your situation and how u handled it add me plez.

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